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Our Healing Passes on Hope
Wednesday, August 30, 2017 by Laura Bender

We've all said it, “I will never recover from this marital betrayal.” We cannot fathom healing! We can't grasp the belief that we'll truly be ok! Even many of us who felt strong in our faith struggled to trust God's promises that addressed our restored heart and future. 

I want to share 6 blog posts from women who are on the other side of their marital betrayal. I love that they are now helping others recover from their pain.

My mind bolts straight to 2 Corinthians 1:4, “...who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.”

I pray daily that God will heal women so they would in turn reach back for their sisters. My heart soars when I read these posts from women who fought for their healing and whose arm is stretched back for yet another wounded woman.

1.  Shelley Martinkus from Redemptive Living For Women guest wrote for The Mops. 

The Shattering Pain of Betrayal Made Me Kinder

“I really didn’t know what it was like to suffer from heart break until I was in my mid to late-twenties. Sure, life hadn’t been perfect before then — I had felt pain before.

But this was different. This was a kind of pain I never expected to feel. The kind of pain I thought for sure I was protected from...”


2.  Meg Wilson from Hope After Betrayal.


“I recently went to a Christian conference and everywhere I went people asked what my ministry was. Over and over people would get uncomfortable when I mentioned my book, “Hope After Betrayal” and the ministry I am starting. Little by little, bits of their shame splashed on me and began to feel heavy.”


3.  Lauren McKinley from Her Soul Repair.

Let It Heal

“I remember having a conversation pretty fresh after the affair about how I just couldn’t imagine my life without my (now ex) husband. We committed to forever when we got married and when those vows were said I removed the idea that this person would ever leave my life. So when the unthinkable happens, and they are abruptly taken from your union, it feels impossible for life to go on.”


4.  Sarah McDugal 

Broken Brings Beautiful

“I’ve been binge-thinking, about what it means to be broken. Not all personalities binge-think, but mine certainly does. Especially when key aspects of life seem to be operating completely outside my control. When I have no idea what God is bringing next, or who, or where, or when, or how. That’s when I easily fall into this constant mental circle of trying to process options, plans, possibilities…”


5.  Jennifer Gafford from Grace Power Strength

Jesus Break My Heart For What Breaks Yours

“What comes to mind when you think of love? Oftentimes we tend to think in terms of couples, dating, romance, marriage, and as parents the love we have for our children. Rarely do we perhaps think of Jesus Christ. And yet the truth is, Jesus Christ is the epitome of love and all it's glorious wonder and sacrifice.”


6.  Megan from Give Her Wings

Jesus Restores the Dignity of Women

“When you work with and speak with former victims of abuse on a regular basis, it can be easy to become disheartened. Team member, Michelle, once asked me how I am able to “put away” the pain I experience along with these precious ladies and move forward. I really don’t know. Most of the time, I am able to (somehow) compartmentalize. Maybe I’m just getting older and my memory is fading. It is probably a gift from God. Sometimes, however, I am deeply affected and I have to step back. Still other times, I am struggling (myself) because I have a past laced with suffering and I have those dark moments I must conquer, as well. These are few and far between. However, I recently wrestled through my own rough couple of days.”


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Laura Bender

Laura serves as the Executive Director on the board of HER. She is passionate about helping  betrayed women who struggle emotionally, spiritually, psychologically, and financially. She has been leading weekly marital betrayal support groups for several years. Currently, Laura connects with leaders, writers, and counselors, to unite the efforts of those who share a burden for betrayed women.

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